Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Dear Nintendo: Consoles Are Not Nikes

The SNES Classic launch is already a disaster. But you knew that was coming and I knew that was coming and honestly I don't see much reason to get too mad about it. I'm still mad anyway because I've always wanted to play games like "Donkey Kong Country" and "Super Metroid" and this was a fantastic affordable way to play. But I was asleep last night and ate lunch at 1 PM today, so I couldn't order one. My Walmart pre-order was cancelled and Walmart did nothing to give me a chance to order again, I just missed my chance at Amazon at 5 AM this morning.

So in the SNES Classic department: I'm fucked.

I don't see why it has to be like this. I don't get why Nintendo has to be so utterly stupid. At least with companies like Walmart you can see the psychopathic corporate logic at play. Walmart has never pretended to be anything other scumfucking evil since the start and when they actually are scumfucking evil, you can't really blame them for it. Nintendo meanwhile acts like this dumb little puppy that is only peeing on your leg because it loves you that much. I've had quite enough of the family-friendly rounded-corners nostalgia hug routine. There's charmingly foolish and then there's the medieval nightmare that is "Splatoon 2"'s voice chat system. Don't call this anything but what it is: stupidity.

The SNES Classic pre-orders are, to nobody's surprise, hopelessly inadequate for the demand of the console. This is either due to gross incompetence on Nintendo's part or some kind of brilliant scheme to drum up interest by limiting supply as all the armchair economists on /r/nintendo claim. Either way, this is supposed to be a nostalgia piece. Now I don't know about your childhood, but I don't recall mine being filled with frustration, failure, and utter confusion. (Unless we're talking Wet-Dry World in "Mario 64".)

I thought Nintendo was a company for everybody. Instead they're trying to be Nike - badly.

Wednesday, August 16, 2017

The Tolerating Intolerance Myth

Since John McCain had to ruin my last post by growing a spine, the Health Care debate is over. The Trump administration has proven itself to be a feeble and utterly useless machine that cannot accomplish any Republican goals. The battle in America isn't in Washington anymore. The battle now is in the streets. Charlottesville this weekend revealed to everybody a lot of ugly things about this country that I've been seeing for a year now. Trump is a failed joke who cannot govern. But as a symbol of the festering evil in this country? Oh, he's a brilliant success.

Donald Trump is not a Nazi. He is however, a source of inspiration to Nazis. He's deeply beloved by Nazis. He hesitates to condemn Nazis when he never hesitates to condemn his own cabinet members. Trump is a willing accomplice to these people and only maintains vague pretenses of plausible deniability. Charlottesville may not be what you thought of when Trump said he would "Make America Great Again", but this is the result. (Trump himself has no idea what MAGA means and never cared to find out.) The president might not believe he is a racist, but his actions, inactions, and statements are a clear message otherwise. There is no political calculus that explains the president's behavior. Also there definitely are no excuses.

The solution for the White Nationalists is not easy. But let's not bog ourselves down in false equivalencies here. Freedom of Speech is a great virtue in this country. However, fantasies about open discourse being the solution to everything have already failed. But while the government can't stop Nazis from speaking, that doesn't mean the rest of us are bound by those same rules. The First Amendment lets you talk. But it doesn't say you're still welcome in society after you've spoken.