Friday, September 14, 2012

A Christmas Story..... 2 Trailer

This is a thing now.

This is one of those trailers that are really terrible, but they don't make you angry. They make you sad. Really really sad. Its a straight-to-DVD sequel to the perennial Christmas classic, "A Christmas Story", that movie you see pretty much every Christmas. I'm not even a huge fan of "A Christmas Story", in fact, I could live the rest of my life never seeing it again, since I already know every joke, every gag, and every moment, its meaningless now. I'm the guy who wants the football game on, usually. But its still a classic, I still have a warm spot for that movie, like the rest of America. And to see it just... tortured by this terrible goddamn idea for a movie, its hard to take. Jean Shepherd, the narrator and comedian who wrote all the Ralphie stories, he's been dead for ten years. What hope could this movie have? NONE. I guess I should ask as to what any of these people were thinking making this movie, but the answer is clear: they weren't thinking, and they aren't actually people.

Its also being made by the same company that made "Ace Ventura Jr.". And no, that exists too. Yeah.

"A Christmas Story 2" is coming out on October 30th, perfectly in time for... Halloween. Probably because they knew this was a true horror movie, frightening in a visceral soul-destroying way that the "Paranormal Activity" movies could only dream of.

Also, this is exactly the worst gift for the holidays. If there's somebody out there you really really hate, buy them "A Christmas Story 2".

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