Bleach Recaps: Ep. 183, The Darkness Which Moves! Kibune's True Colors

I think at this point we're all pretty sick of this Amagai arc.  Its been mediocre episode after mediocre episode, with only the briefest highlights in occasional combat.  Today's episode does not really have any highlights.  There are a few staged fights between certain members of the Soul Society, but they don't actually fight-fight.  They talk for awhile, maybe have their swords touch like three times, then they all become friends again.  Bleh.

At the start of the episode, Amagai, newly converted to Ichigo's side, is seen running around with the fugitives.  So, Captain No. #1 immediately decides that Amagai must be a traitor as well and then orders for him to be captured too.  El Capitan Uno is kind of a stupid leader, without any kind of imagination or flexibility.  In fact, this Yamamoto guy has been nothing but a stumbling block for years now, getting in Ichigo's way every single season somehow.  And yet for some reason instead of sending this possibly senile old man into an Old Age Home every Soul Reaper still respects his word as law.  Guess what?  For the rest of the episode the entire Soul Society is about to fall into chaos.  This folks, is why they pay Yamamoto the big bucks.

Almost immediately Renji runs into Squad 7's Lieutenant, Iba, from now on known as Lieutenant Flat-top thanks to his bizarre choice in hair style..  They get into an argument over whether they should follow orders like morons or betray the Soul Society like intelligent people.  Then someplace else, Squad 9's Lieutenant, Shuhei, from now on known as "Mr. 69" thanks to his tattoo, is attacked by Squad 11 and Cueball Ikkaku.  Are things heating up?  Hell no.

Just for kicks, let's review the combat record of all four of these dudes.  Renji has lost every fight he's been in, no exceptions.  Even so, he has Bankai, so should be able to handle a Lieutenant with ease.  Flat-top has been beaten by the Bount Go Koga and by the Lord of the Shiny Scalp, Ikkaku.  Also in Flat-top's backstory I believe he was beaten by Yachiru, who is a seven-year-old girl (but a serious badass and Kenpachi's best friend).  Meanwhile, Ikkaku has won almost every fight he's been in, defeating Arancars along with Soul Reapers losing only to Ichigo.  Ikkaku also has Bankai.  Finally Mr. 69 has next-to-no known battle experience, fighting a couple inconclusive battles with a few Bounts.  He did take on another Squad 11* member, Yumichika (had to look that name up), the Girly One.  The conclusion of that fight was an implication that Mr. 69 took it up the ass.

Based upon those records, if this were to turn into a battle, I must conclude that Renji and Cueball would easily beat Flat-top and Mr. 69.  Bankai is a nasty advantage.

Meanwhile, Kira is still looking for Kibune.  And now he's trying to think.  Aww... how cute.

"DURR, NO LIKE THINKING!"

Eventually Kira figures that Kibune must be hiding in an old gym.  This scene is especially inscrutable since Kira is basically forced to play Sherlock Holmes without a Watson to bounce ideas off of.  In fact, who the Hell is he talking to?  I bet if anybody found this guy standing around talking to himself right now, they'd think he was completely out of his mind.  Of course, since most people on "Bleach" are out of their minds, they probably won't think twice about it.  Anyway, now half the episode has passed and really nothing at all has happened.

CAPTAIN'S MEETING TIME!  During the meeting, Captain Jushiro, being intelligent, asks that they investigate whatever the heck the Kasamacrunchberryoji Clan was doing.  I mean, its not like they've been acting intensely suspiciously or being are led by an obliviously evil ape-creature, right?  No way that Ichigo had good reason to interrupt that wedding.  Well, Yamamoto is in a bad mood lately because he thinks his Dominican nurse is stealing from him, so he screams:  "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  I forbid any investigation into that Clan!  I haven't had an erection in two thousand years!  MATLOCK!"

This is the reaction that the Captains give him:

"Is he serious with this bullshit?"

So that's the end of that.  Yamamoto then leaves to get the Early Bird special at the Town and Country Inn, while the other Captains wonder if he's completely lost his shit.  It actually would be a cool twist if it turned out that Yamamoto had joined with the Evil Old Guy in a scheme to take down the youngin's.  Old dudes unite!  But that won't happen.  For some reason Yamamoto is still considered a good guy by whatever strange standard this show uses to judge morality.

Meanwhile, the fights finally have happened with fourteen minutes into this show.  You might have already fallen asleep so you might have missed the best parts.  Anyway, Renji has to ask "Are orders really everything?"  To which Flat-top replies, with a very deep breath beforehand:  "THEY ARE TO MMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!"  But then just a few minutes later Flat-top decides to betray orders anyway and try to find Ichigo to find out what's going on.  Of course, if he has really betrayed the Soul Society the sentance will be DEATH!!!  So that's how that plotline ends, really lame.  I bet you five bucks that neither Renji, Cueball, Flat-top, or Mr. 69 will actually affect anything in this arc's storyline and this whole storyline is pointless.

Its occured to me that the main point of tension in these battles is whether or not Ichigo is actually a traitor.  Well, we know that answer!  So there's no tension at all!  If that actually was a mystery this could be a very interesting situation where you would have no idea which side you're supposed to be on.  Of course, is interrupting a silly wedding really such a big crime that all this madness must occur?

Anyway, back to Kira.  He runs into a couple of other Squad 3ers who mention that poor drunken idiot who was murdered last week.  Kira, being a master detective figures out that Kibune was the killer.  (We know that already numbnuts!  Move on!)  He then finds the Princess in her birdcage in that abandoned gym mentioned earlier.  Looks like the Princess is able to escape!

Wait no, NINJARS have her surrounded again.  Well, that didn't last long.  Actually her escape attempt was such a fail that I had to laugh a bit.  Of course, no as much as I did when Flat-top was screaming about how important orders are to "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!" but still.  Kira winds up fighting with the ninja army of the Evil Old Guy.

"I will be the God of the new world."

The fight goes pretty well for Kira, until the ninjas simply leave taking the Princess with them.  So she won't be saved today.  Kira runs in to save her, but then all of a sudden a boomerang sword blocks his way.  Its Kibune!  Kibune says "Can't let you do that, Star Fox."  (I'm serious, the guy has the same tone of voice, slight English accent, and everything.)  And so the battle is on!  Kira vs. Kibune!

ANNNNNNNNDD, espiode over!  All the interesting stuff is for next week!  HAHA!

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* There are something like half a dozen named Squad 11 members - Kenny, Yachiru, Cueball, Pretty-Boy, and some old guy named Maki-Maki, compared to one member of Squad 3, Kira.  So which Squad do you pick to focus an arc around?  Squad 3, of course!